July 8th, 1978: "Hans and Alice-Till Death Do Us Part"

Yesterday was Mom and Dad's 43rd Wedding Anniversary.  Their marriage has endured tremendous hardships.  They went from a well to do family with a cook, a maid, a nursemaid for me, and then a nurse for Betty, to having three children, no staff, and now money when the C.C.C. collapsed with the outbreak of World War II.

Howard was born prematurely with an incomplete palate, had to be nursed for hours with a special bottle, and-at six months old-had to be hospitalized and drugged to keep him from tearing his lungs apart with whooping cough.

Mom ran her hand through the washing machine wringer and broke all the bones in her hand, and Dad had to be hospitalized with mumps. 

He tried all the services in turn and they rejected him because of his crippled hands (EDITOR'S NOTE: Fireworks accident), so he finally joined the Armed Services branch of the Red Cross.  Then Mom and Dad endured endless separations while he was regularly transferred on 24 hour notice.  We moved all ove rth United States, with Mom usually coping with the moves.  The worst moment was when Dad had to leave for Alaska on Christmas Eve.  He was gone two years and Howard forgot him, and I didn't recognize him when he came home.

Then there was the struggle of finding a civilian job again, in a place where mom could teach-and the breaking up of the family began when I went away to college.

There were years osf separatin (I made it home only once in 8 years) as Betty, Howard, and I married (in my case, more than once) and moved about.  Then Dad was hospitalized again, Mother developed cancer, and had to have X-ray treatments, then had a stroke, then found she had Multiple Sclerosis (MS).  Her physical condition has steadily declined.  She had several broken bones, then broker her hip, which put her in a wheelchair...and she only has one functioning kidney.

Just a few days before their Anniversary, Mom was hospitalized again.  Dad shares her nursing care wtih Betty, but he has cataracts and trouble with his vision.

But in spite of all their troubles, their marriage has endured for 43 years.  I'm afraid I lack the patience, the endurance (even the stoicism), and the ability to compromise that has kept them together all these years.

Thinking of them, "ti;; death do us part" emerges as real commitment.